For the betterment of society I have decided to reveal my top five pick up lines. I hope these tried-and-true sentiments can help break the ice and foster a real connection between you and your incipient soulmate.
5. Everybody comes with baggage – mine’s monogrammed.
4. Gotta fly? I’ll see you around, robin.
3. I like dick, and you possess some anatomical features that lead me to believe that you might have one. May I see it?
2. Ampersands are MY favorite form of punctuation, too!
1. You’ve got the silliest tits in town!
Author’s Note: Enthusiasm and volume really help #1 along. Never be ashamed to declare the degree of silliness to which you find someone’s tits. Likely they’ll be flattered, and thank you for pointing it out later.