MISFIT DOC: Arabella’s Dictionary

Budtown: Dating site for losers. Folks join Budtown who are thrice divorced, delight in recidivism and keep beer in the trunk of their cars. Second most popular website in the country.

Charellant (sha-rel-lant): Adjective to describe a trilling voice inside one’s head that sends out signals to others silently and psychically. A charellant voice can say ‘I love you’ to another from a thousand miles away and be received with a startling clarity that will uplift and send the listener into another galaxy entirely. People speak to one another with charellant voices much more often and in greater detail than fact or reason could ever acknowledge.

Duqucker (doo-kwuk-er): A duqucker is someone who, like a lovebird in spring, bursts into song when on a moving elevator. He ceases the canary immediately when the hoist stops, but fervidly resumes his sonata as soon as the lift takes flight again.

Effubatrin (ef-u-bah-trin): Pill for jerks.

Gazisser (ga-zis-er): Section of the cheek that gets kissed unwantedly by weird relatives. ‘Oh, no, I got mushed on the gazisser by Creepy Uncle Ed’.

Gojevarro (go-jeh-var-ro): Woke drug dealer. A gojevarro remembers to say ‘Happy Holidays’ instead of  ‘Merry Christmas’ to his wretched and debased patrons. He is extremely gender conscious and not afraid to peddle his products to the homeless. Wonderful, respectful and sober-minded guy.

Incalent (in-ca-lent):  An incalent person is incapable of matching socks. He is known for being seen in public with two glaringly miscolored foot covers.

Martyrdon (mar-ter-don): A high -ranking mafia member who complains and suffers constantly.

Pardle (par-dul): To pardle is to drive down the street with something hanging out the door of one’s car. The intent does not matter here – one can have something hanging out the door unknowingly, or very much on purpose. But when a coattail, seatbelt, shopping bag or old t-shirt is seen at the bottom of a car door dragging helplessly down the street, the driver is pardling. And may be fined.

Pennydolly (pen-ee-dol-lee): Rickety, pint-sized shopping cart found at the Dollar Store.

Tabopper (tuh-bop-pur): A tabopper is a person who just loves to pop bubble wrap. ‘Tabop-pop-pop’ can be heard throughout the house when a tabopper delightedly goes to town on her pack of airy beads.

Y.E.C.L. (Yes, Everyone Can Levitate!): Popular workshop for drifters.

 

Andrea Bock is a piano teacher and a Dr. Who fan. She went to Ohio Wesleyan, but dropped out after discovering her true birth parents were a Nun and the grandson of a Rabbi.

Andrea later finished her degree and worked for a hospice, writing songs in the evenings with her cats. She is a proud mother now, focused on family, music and words.

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