Hello.

The word Hello always reminds me of that Doors song that goes, “Hello/I love you/won’t you tell me your name…”

So I was in New York the other day and I’m standing on the corner singing that song and this woman in black walks by. I mean, I barely notice her. Next thing you know I’m in a street harassment video that gets millions of views around the internet.

I asked the director to edit me out, but he tells me he can’t; something about me not being white. Sucks.

Anyway, what the fuck am I doing here?

I’ll be posting little humor bits, mockeries I call them or satirical essays when I want to sound sophisticated. Hope I’m funny. Got a whole manuscript of them sitting on my hard drive, but I promise you I’ll write new ones.

Also, I’ll post more serious critical and/or political stuff too. At some point I’ll draw up a list of things I want to write and you’ll see them when they show up on the screen of your device.

I’m also going to pretend like the Queen Mob’s editors gave me my own vertical and I’ll hijack the site to post your humor pieces. I’ll work up some guidelines soon and you can send me stuff.

This is all part of my plan to run a shadow site right here under the editors’ noses. When they least expect it, me and a band of literary rebels will storm in with guns and seize control of the Queen Mob’s Tea House.

Shit, did I say that out loud?

Me: I am a fictionist and a satirist and a twitterist and the rest don’t fucking matter.