Ross Park Mall will always be my favorite mall. It is glamorous, it is clean. It is north of Pittsburgh and largely inaccessible, guaranteeing that only people with cars shall enter. I am in Pittsburgh but I can still shop at Louis Vuitton or Juicy Couture. I have never seen a cop here.
Holyoke Mall, Holyoke, MA
Holyoke Mall is a mess. As you walk down the stairs to the food court everything is concrete. Not glamorous concrete but concrete that something has been removed from. There are only women’s bathrooms and a “NO MEN” sign blocks the entry. This mall has a Target. This mall has a Sephora. This mall has a Forever 21. This mall is decay. Much like the Johnson Wax Building by Frank Lloyd Wright, the entrances are obfuscated. You enter through the womb. I always park by the Forever 21 and walk past the dumpster to the small glass door. The entrance presents pressure and shelter. Upon opening the door and moving my body a foot towards the entrance, I emerge into the light. I am overwhelmed by empty space and lighting that makes me feel ugly. I have emerged from the womb to the light of late capitalism. This is me. This is who I am.
Vancouver Mall, Vancouver, WA
One day after a sermon at church when I was eleven we were stirred enough to go to Claire’s so I could get my ears pierced. What was it the pastor said? Did he tell my family to relax? It was soccer season and I had to wear bandaids over my ears for weeks. The Nordstrom closed but at least my grandmother died first.
Lloyd Center Mall, Portland, OR
I went this summer because I was crying and couldn’t drive. I went to Ulta and bought lipstick in the palest pink. I pretended I was Monica Vitti and stared wide eyed at the ice skaters waiting for them to fall.
Fashion Show Mall, Las Vegas, NV
They sold slurpees that had whiskey in them. I bought a shirt but it was actually a bra.
Hampshire Mall, Hadley, MA
I still can’t find the entrance but I pass the sign every day. I heard they have a pinball machine. When is the mall not a mall? When it is the movie theater.
Atlantic Terminal Mall, Brooklyn, NY
There is a UNIQLO here. I had just been to brunch with a bottomless mimosa. I touched every pair of tights. All soft. All using Japanese Technology. I am in a crowd but I am in a Mall but I am in New York and I run into someone I almost had sex with over the summer but I didn’t. No matter how big the world gets it is smaller than I think. Even in New York City you can fuck and not be heard. I keep repeating “How can you live here?” but I know already.
Westlake Center Mall, Seattle, WA
I’m with my mom for the first time in three years. We are visiting my sister because she bought her wedding dress online and can’t open the box alone. I can’t open the box either so I sit on the ground in a corner as if I am in the womb again. It is always about returning to the womb. I can’t go to the mall without thinking of my mother. Later, my mother tries to buy me everything but I don’t let her. Those dresses, mother, are who you are to me.
Pioneer Courthouse Square Mall, Portland, OR
I never see anyone I know here even though I lived here. When I was 14 the Forever 21 opened here. I was on the basketball team. The pretty girl with the shiny dark brown ponytail bought the black baseball tee with the baby blue sparkly “21” on it. Weeks later, I bought the white one. This didn’t change the fact that I didn’t shave my legs. This is the first mall I have been to with a gem store. I heard there was an art gallery on the top floor. I heard someone tried to hang themselves as an art performance and the gallery closed.
