Reinterpretation*

“Speak for England, Arthur!” shouted a voice. Greenwood, encouraged by that voice, was able to deliver the historic speech that pressed government to open war against Germany.

I always have wanted to be a politician that fights ever since I was first elected. … And it means to listen to the voice of Japanese people to “Speak for Japan.”

―Shinzo Abe [1]

 

Honorable representatives,

I would like to go with one plus two is five from today.

― That is a good idea, sir. … unanimously sang his party members.

―No, that is wrong. … unanimously yelled the opposite parties’ members.

 

Being fair I will give you a chance to speak.

 

One plus two is three.

――A representative shows with her fingers that one plus two is three.

 

One plus two is five is sound. Simple and logical, read two as four. Also a 120 kilogram sumo wrestler plus two 13 year olds are equal to five 13 year olds.

―Yes, that is so true, sir. … unanimously sang his party members.

―No! No! That is false logic. … unanimously yelled the opposite parties’ members

 

I, being a good law-abiding person, you have a chance to refute.

 

You cannot interpret two as four. Nor a sumo wrestler as one, when your unit of one is 40 kilos.

――A representative speaks softly with a smile that says this is so obvious.

 

Did they have their turns to speak as it says in the law?

―Yes, they did sir, he replied.

―And they are wrong a (holds her finger up) sumo wrestler is one, sir, she added.

 

Let’s take a vote.

―Sure. … unanimously sang his party members.

―No! … unanimously yelled the opposite parties’ members

 

Final statements before voting:

 

Please respect reason, use your own intelligence, and behave with decorum, honorable representatives. Speak for people, an expert witness plead.

 

I know, it is not supported by the people and the support is not increasing; however, it will gain support after the bill passes and time passes, stated he.

 

Do not engage in physical fights! — the chairperson’s voice is faintly heard.

The fight video clip goes viral internationally.

.

Thank you, good obedient ones, we are the democratic majority: we won. We were so right: one plus two is five. They can’t understand it, they are ignorant, but they will eventually come around, and thank me for the chang

 

* This piece is inspired by the reinterpretation process of the Japanese Security Bills by Prime Minister Abe:
「安保法案 首相、支持なくとも採決『成立後に国民は理解』」(Japanese Security Bills To Be Voted Without [Public] Support Says Prime Minister “Japanese People Will Understand After It’s Established ) Tokyo Shimbun, September 15, 2015.
http://www.tokyo-np.co.jp/article/politics/list/201509/CK2015091502000122.html
【9月15日安保法制公聴会 濱田邦夫氏(弁護士・元最高裁判所判事)】[Public Hearing on Japanese Security Bill Reforms Kunio Hamda (Attorney, Former Supreme Court Justice) September 15] https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=slYdXMrnuDo
“U.S. welcomes Japan’s enactment of new security legislation,” the Japan Times, September 19, 2015. http://www.japantimes.co.jp/news/2015/09/19/national/politics-diplomacy/u-s-welcomes-japans-enactment-new-security-legislation/#.VvSGE2dJmwx
[1] Shinzo Abe, 『新しい国へ - 美しい国へ 完全版』(Toward a New Country: A Complete Version of Toward a Beautiful Japan), Bunshun: Tokyo, 2013, p.8.

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